I am so excited that you're here and you're showing up to yourselves in such a way. Um And excited about our topic for today. So I wanna start by saying whatever your motivation is for being here, I fully support you and I am here to be of service.OK? So this is not one of those sessions where it's just me talking at you. I am here to support you on your journey. OK? And feel free to drop questions you have in the chat or you can connect with me on linkedin. Uh So today, here's what we are going to cover. So if you have pen and paper, this is a good time to pull it out. Uh We are going to identify your primary triggers that create an uneasiness when you even think about promoting yourself. We're going to cover how to analyze, analyze how your brain influences your fear of self promotion. And then you're going to um I'm gonna teach you the framework that I use with myself and my clients, corporate and private to help them develop their own visibility toolkit so that you always feel seen and you feel hurt really quick, I wanna ask you to do me something. Do me a really quick favor in the chat. I want you to drop what's in it for you? What made you show up for this session? What was it about this session that made you say? I need to be in that room?

I just wanna know cause a lot of times we are often in spaces for some similar reasons and it's really good to know how much we think alike as well as celebrate our differences in thought. There is no right or wrong answer. Um It's scary to present. I'm speaking to my manager regarding a promotion this week. Oh yes, I'm good at promoting others but not so much myself. I want to be more seen at my company. Um I've had this others take credit for my work and I need to stand up for myself. Wow, these are, y'all, don't you feel supported? Just reading these, these comments? Just sometimes it just feels good to know you're not in this thing alone. You are not the only one struggling with limiting beliefs, struggling with imposter syndrome, struggling to speak up and struggling to show up in the fullness of who you are called to be, whether it's in the workplace, at home, in your business. I appreciate you all sharing this.

Um I need better skills to promote myself and move ahead at work. Oh, these are all fabulous. Thank you all for being vulnerable with me as well. Um I don't take that for granted at all. So my who and my why? So I am Britney Sherell, if you are new to me and I work with organizations to empower their leaders to move with clarity and confidence so that they can teach their organization and their teams how to uh show up and take powerful action, how to get people more engaged, how to help people show up more confidently because we all know that these things drive the bottom line.

Um And it, and it drives the company culture. So I mean, who wants to work somewhere where no one wants to be there, right? You want your people to wanna be there? And so that requires some very strategic support that I enjoy providing. And it all stemmed from my own experiences in the workplace. Uh Let me know in the chat if any part of this resonates with you. So I realized um that I was, I remember being promoted to a new position and, and you know, you're new to it. So you're looking for ways to get support. Um I was assigned a mentor for the role. And what happened was once we got behind closed doors. Now, mind you, the mentor had been working um in this area in this field for decades. OK. Once we got behind closed doors, honey, come to find out the mentor had been winging it, right? And I, I realized over time that this was a huge problem that was not just only singled out in that one situation, it kept happening over and over and I would talk to people and realize that people were afraid to show up and ask questions for fear of losing credibility. They were not really showing up, getting their questions answered being vulnerable because they didn't feel safe to speak up about the things they needed support with or needed more development.

And I was like, no, we deserve to be able to show up and be honest about what we are struggling with without a fear of losing credibility. So I set out through my organization to work with other companies to help create those safe spaces by providing uh keynotes, personal development training. Um and you know, company wide trainings, all those kind of cool things, right? And I have a background as an educator. So I just love teaching and learning the whole process of it all. And so this allows me to do it on my own terms at a larger scale. And I absolutely enjoy, yes, there should be a safe place, but we all know the reality is a lot of organizations struggle in that area. So these are some of the organizations that have featured me and I've worked with and um I look forward to expanding uh the impact throughout the world, right? So I already asked you what was in it for you and that is strategic because I want you to start developing this practice.

Whenever you show up, when you show up to work, when you show up to a, a team meeting, when you show up to any type of thing that requires your time, your energy, your resources, your attention, I want you to always get in the practice of asking what's in it for me. You deserve to know the answer to that question because your time, your energy, your resources, your attention are valuable, your wisdom, your expertise, your experiences are valuable. And so you absolutely deserve to show up and ask yourself what's in it for me. And that way you can make informed decisions about where you should be spending time and where you shouldn't be spending time or how much energy you should be given in certain spaces or certain uh issues that arise based on your answer to that question. It also primes you to be able to easily identify when the things you say you want actually show up. Cause sometimes we have what we want and we don't even realize it because we have not set our intentions. We have not even spelled out what we want to even recognize when it has showed up in your life already. So I want you to go ahead and get in the practice of asking what's in it. For me, it could be relationships even in your romantic relationships. What's in it for me do not be afraid to ask that question or feel like you're being selfish. So really quick in the chat, I want you to let me know on a scale of 1 to 10. How comfortable are you with promoting yourself right now?

So when it comes to whether you're on the job, whether you you are also an entrepreneur, I want you to let me know in the chat on a scale of 1 to 10 when it comes to promoting yourself, talking about yourself putting yourself out there. What do you feel like you are? Ok. All right. I see some twos, fives, threes, six, sevens, eights, twos, fours. Yes, y'all are all in the right room. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes, this is perfect. Ok. Just you know, I have to check in with y'all to make sure we in the right space. Ok. And we are. Ok. So how much do you think the fear of self promotion costs women on average in the workplace? Drop your response in the chat? A $50,000 B $500,000 C $5000 D $5 million on average. How much do you think it costs women in the workplace? Ok. I see some A's B's. I saw like one maybe three BS BC. Ok.

Ok. Let's

digest this $500,000 in wages by the age of 60. And I'm pausing on purpose because I need us to let that sink in. Yes. Rebecca, we need that. We need to let that sit for a moment, $500,000. What could that do for the trajectory of your family, the trajectory of your dreams, your goals, whatever those things may be where they're starting AAA business or you know, being able to take a year off from everything and just travel the world. So what could that do for your life? That's why you have to get comfortable with asking yourself what's in it for me? What is in it for me? Because it is literally costing you when you don't speak up when you don't put yourself out there? All right. So do you agree with this? Let me know, do you agree or disagree confidently promoting yourself is the key to achieving all of our goals. Do you agree? Do you, do you think something else? Let me know in the chat. Let me know how, how, how we're feeling about this, this statement? OK. So I'm seeing some straight agrees in the chat. OK? 100%. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes. So it really is since we know like we agree with this and yet it is such a struggle like we know it's the key to it all, but it's still a struggle.

So let's talk about where this fear of promoting yourself is coming from because I believe in getting to the root of stuff. Number one, a need for clarity. Sometimes we just need clarity we feel unclear about what we should really be doing. We're unclear about what language to use. We're unclear about the timing, the structure. We need clarity. I strongly believe that it's difficult to be confident in what you're not clear on. So sometimes it is stemming from a need for clarity. Sometimes it's from mental sabotage.

I, the way we talk to ourselves in our heads. I, I'm not qualified enough. I need another C certification who's gonna listen to little old me, I don't have the same level of experience. I came from a totally different background. I don't speak the same way they speak. Maybe I have a list uh like and who's gonna take me seriously? I want you to stop right now and recognize and acknowledge the fact that every thought, you know, like we like to think we don't lie to ourselves, right? But the truth is, every thought is not a fact. Every thought is not a fact. So when these thoughts attack us, we have to ask ourselves like, is this fear or is this a fact? What's the, what's the, what are the facts about whatever this statement is? Like, is this substantiated with facts or is this fear or nervousness or like, really trying to understand what's really at the root? And number three, sometimes it comes from feeling a deficit in support, like the support might be feeling like we're not supported at work. It may feel like we're not supported at home. You know, maybe your spouse, your significant other, your kids, they don't get the workload you're carrying at work and why you're burnt out and why you're not able to produce and how you need certain support or you're trying to have certain conversations and people don't understand and it's just a lot because you feel alone, these are all things that impact our ability to speak up with confidence about what we need, what we desire.

Now, let's dig a little deeper and talk about how our brain feeds into this, how our brain actually feeds into this. All right, there's this, this uh psychological term called group attribution theory, group attribution theory. Remember I told you it was a good time to pull out your pen and paper if you did not, um if you did not have it, OK, group attribution theory. So group attribution theory is a type of bias that leads us to believe that the characteristics of an individual represent those of an entire group. So for instance, most people, many people have like research shows that most people have a negative connotation of sales people.

Like when you think of a salesperson, most people, even if it's subconsciously, you think about a car salesman, like a pushy car salesman. And that is because a lot of times in movies, there's been this rhetoric of around um a character who revolves around being a car salesman who's really pushy. And makes you feel uncomfortable and tries to make you buy something that you really want, uh, that you don't really want or need. And so what happens is we tend to lump everything sales related into that same idea that and, and though it evokes those same emotions that we have when we think about a pushy car salesman. Although that is not the case for all sales people. Like if you have a business, if you have dreams, goals, all of us are salespeople. That's the truth of the matter. You have to sell your kids on folding laundry. You have to sell your kids on cleaning up their room. You have to sell your husband on fixing that shelf that you've been asking to get fixed for the past, you know, 30 days. Like you are a salesperson.

If you have any ideas, any dreams, goals, aspirations, responsibilities to carry out any time you are enlisting or trying to empower people to take some type of action. You're selling them on something that doesn't make you bad, that doesn't make you dishonest. But because of group attribution theory, anything related to sales, like we don't even see sales as serving people. We, we see it as, oh my gosh, like it feels so Icky Mary said yes. As a former salesperson, the perception is not good and harmful for women. Absolutely. Yes. Absolutely. So group attribution theory is one of those things in our minds in our heads. In our brains that play tricks on us and makes us wanna lump everything into that group. So, you know, maybe in school you had that one loud person that was always talking, they were annoying. They didn't really talk about much and most people rolled their eyes when they started talking. Well, sometimes when it's time for us to speak up on behalf of ourselves, we don't want to be seen as that person without giving the proper space and grace to ourselves to understand that I am not that person just because I speak up. I have things of substance to say what my opinions, my ideas, they matter. I'm not just being loud or what, what do they say? Strong and wrong, being strong and wrong. I'm not showing up just talking and saying stuff to be strong and wrong.

Like the things that I say are factual, they are important. They are um very valuable. So we have to avoid falling prey to that group attribution theory. OK. Next, the spotlight effect, the spotlight effect means that we overestimate how much others are actually paying attention to us.

So like, you know, when you see people who have a business and they post about a workshop one time and then nobody signs up and they're ready to throw the whole thing away. A lot of times it's the spotlight effect. They assume if I just put this thing out, guess what the whole world is gonna see it and so the whole world is gonna see it. I can't talk about it but so many times because they're gonna get tired of hearing about me. And the truth is people don't think about us nearly as much as we think. They think about us. The spotlight effect, substantiates that. So like when you speak up, you think team meeting or you go to, to uh someone on your team, a supervisor, manager, uh uh co-partner, whatever it is, you go to them and you're like, I don't really wanna speak up. I don't really wanna say too much because I don't wanna be annoying. I don't want people to, you. People are not even viewing you in the way that you think they are, they're not speak up at every meeting. Don't feel like you gotta space out the times you speak up, speak up at every meeting, speak up every time, something you see a, a potential solution or you see an area of opportunity or you see uh some way to close a gap, speak up every single time because we often overestimate how much others are paying attention to

us.

Um Rihanna, you asked, could I show the last slide? Um Yeah, I'll go back really quick but I'll also say this. If you all end up wanting these slides, you can just DM Me on linkedin, I'll, I'll happily send you like the PDF of the slides because I know it's kinda hard to just keep up and take notes and stuff super fast. So this breakdown leads to burnout stagnant career advancement, loss of time and impact as well as money because you're hoarding great ideas that no one knows about. And you're basically hoping and wishing that people just recognize your greatness that people will do right by you.

That people will always offer you the ropes to advancement. You know, like, hey, here's the road map. You deserve more than that. All right. So let me know in the chat, are you ready to ditch the uneasiness and show up big in your life? Let me know in the chat. Let me know if you still rocking with me, you're ready to ditch the fear. You're ready to ditch the the stomach flips and all that good stuff when it's time to speak up. I like that. Alexis. I see you. Yes, I see you. Amy Jill Nazanin, Sarah Riley Jack. OK. OK. We in the right we in the right room. Let's talk about the move method of confident promotion. OK? You can call it the move method of confident promotion, confident communication, what it confidence, call it, what you need to. But this is your communication strategy move stands for mindset outlook, viability and execution.

OK.

This is our proprietary framework for showing up big for driving impact in organizations because people have ditched imposter syndrome. They have the the tool kit for confidence and communication to speak up and get things done, mindset, mindset. What do I believe to be true about myself before I can worry about how other people respond to me or worry about how other people may view me because I speak up. What do I believe to be true about myself? That's just like somebody telling you the sky is red and it's a clear blue sky and you know that, you know that, you know, the sky is a clear blue sky. Now mind you, you know, certain weather, certain times of the evening there might be a red tent to the sky, right? But let's just pretend that it is blue as I get up outside, that's like somebody coming and trying to tell you and argue with you that the sky is blue, but you the sky is red. But you know that, you know that, you know that you know that the sky is blue, it is not red. You don't even stop for a second to try to reason with adopting what they believe to be true about the sky.

You know that, you know, but if you have not taken the time to really discover what you truly believe to be true about yourself, then it puts you in a position to just accept what other people say about you or give too much weight to what they may say. Here, here's that last slide and I'm gonna just let you all know again if you need the slides, I'll send them to you just DM me on connect with me on linkedin and I don't mind sending them over. Alright. Outlook. How do I envision the future? How do I envision the future? So when we think about the future, let's think about that question I asked you about how much money is left on the table by women? Ok. Re remember that number re remember that number. So and Aaron, you are not, you are not alone, but you need to remember that number that $500,000 we talked about because there is something our male counterparts have, they have this un unrivaled level of confidence to be wrong and strong a whole lot of time and it gives them so much further.

Imagine how much further we could be if we are right and in sight, I just thought of that, you know, but I think it's pretty cool. Right? Let me know you. Do you think it's cool? What if we are right? And in sight, meaning we are visible, we are visible. We are heard we are seen. Mary said, I don't want to cosign their wrong and strong. Absolutely. That's why you gonna be right and in sight because you're going to own your own power. So how do you envision the future for yourself? What are, what are the things that you desire and how will you get there? How much longer will it take you to get there. If you aren't paying attention to opportunities to speak up and share and be visible and try new things and ask for things even when it's uncomfortable. V is for viability. Do I have the tools to succeed? Sometimes we skip this step. We talk about what we want, but we don't really discover what it takes to get there. What are the tools I need? Who are the people I need in my corner? Because let me tell you when you start to show up and speak up that and you decide to do something different. That is when you are most vulnerable. Don't skip this step.

Go ahead and preplan like what are the things that I think I need in order to get me there? Who are the people that I need in my corner to get me there? And then e is for execution. How can I take powerful action? Tamara said, put it on a T shirt right in sight. That will be a pretty, pretty dope t-shirt. OK. Execution is all about how can I take powerful action? So now that I've determined who, what I believe to be true about myself, not based on fear, but based on fact, I am enough already, I have enough, I have enough degrees, certifications, enough experience, enough expertise. I have enough already. Let me tell you something about entrepreneurs.

About 30 there's some research that suggests that um about 30% of entrepreneurs only have a high school uh diploma, meaning there are people out here beast it making multimillion dollars some billions and don't have certifications don't have degrees, but they're sure of who they are and what direction they are taking.

So ask yourself, how can I take powerful action? Do I need to have? Do I need to build me a list of scripts for setting boundaries and emails, a list of scripts for when people call me? And it's something that is, I just don't need to be talking about. How can I take powerful action so that we're not just setting stuff, we're enforcing it as well because you can set boundaries and all these um rules and expectations, but the truth comes out when it's time to enforce it. So here are some strategies that you can use and I'm gonna actually share three more tips that you can take back and use even with your team, shift your mindset from promotion to providing context. When you show up, you speak up, you ask for the promotion, you ask for the flexibility, you ask for whatever. Don't think of it as I'm just promoting myself, think of it as I'm providing context as for how this empowers this workspace, how it, how it empowers my productivity and how it impacts the team as a whole.

Number two, assess your current level of visibility based on touch points. So how often am I showing up? What are the ways I'm showing up. And number three, you can sh you know, shift how you approach promoting yourself by tapping into your move framework. So the move framework, we just went over and remember I told you if you DDM me on linkedin, I'll share the slides with you. So key takeaways, self promotion is threaded through almost everything you already do. And it's directly linked to your level of success. Your mind is number two is your mind is wired, deceive, self promotion as a threat which triggers a false sense of fear. And number three use that move framework. OK? Now, here's some tips for promoting your, your team to speak up because maybe you're not the only one there who is struggling. OK? Here's some quick tips. Number one, share your questions ahead of time. If you're facilitating meetings, share the questions ahead of time so that people have a have a moment to wrap their heads around. What is, what is coming up? Some people just don't do well, speaking on the spot, they need a little bit of time to process. OK? Number two, conduct an anonymous survey in real time and then discuss so you can use certain tools and have an anonymous survey while you're in a huddle or whatever and allow people to just go on their individual devices, vote on or share comments anonymously and then you go ahead and discuss those things right there in the open use, empathy and respect.

Um You know, and let people know this is a great idea. I'm glad someone shared this. You don't even have to have the names. Um, and number three, ask your team, what are ways you can create a psychologically safe space? Ok. Don't try to just figure it out all on your own. Ask, just ask what can I do to make you feel safer, uh, for speaking up. These are also suggestions you can pass along to your executive team as well if they're the ones facilitating these things, and I'm gonna give you a bonus because I believe in over delivering, genuinely consider your team's input, whether it's positive or problem, consider it as data and make sure your team understands that you take that approach and that they trust that approach.

Whether people tell you something positive or if they express a problem, use that information as data, don't take it personally. This is giving me data on how I can take action moving forward. OK? So really quick, let me know, have you learned at least one thing to help you overcome the fear of promoting yourself? Drop a one in the chat. If you've learned at least one thing, I see some yeses. I see some one that makes my heart smile because we deserve the absolute best. So I need you to make sure you do the most important thing which is take action. OK? I have enjoyed sharing space with you. All today. Um Please don't hesitate to reach out and connect with me on linkedin. If you have any questions, you want to continue the conversation or even if you're interested in bringing me into your organization for training or to deliver keynotes, I would love to connect with you so that we can partner. Um And let me know how this has helped you just send me ad M on linkedin. I always love reading, um those sorts of things. So I hope you all have an amazing rest of your experience here during the conference.